Good morning once again. Today, I have a couple MOTD’s to share. I just got my hands on the Huda Beauty Obsession Palettes and wanted to play with them. This past week was rather quiet and for the most part pleasant until the weekend. I kind of fell into a funk and all I wanted to do was sleep and cry. We’ll talk about that later though. Let’s talk makeup.
I just liked my hair in this picture.
Anyway, this look was just playing around with the Huda Smoky Obsession Palette. That one has some amazing metallics. I was also testing out the Urban Decay All Nighter Foundation. This is kind of my go-to glam look.
I really liked the lip combo I did. It’s Nyx Liquid Suede in Brooklyn Thorn paired with Bite Beauty Amuse Bouche Liquid Lipstick in Demi-Glace.
Another day of just playing in makeup I used the Huda Warm Obsessions Palette. I was surprised how pink this palette pulls. I was expecting more orangey looks and it be more of a one trick pony but I was pleasantly surprised at the colors on the eye. I paired this one with a wing liner in Colourpop Cream Liner in Best O and Too Faced Melted Matte Lip in Queen Bee.
Now for the Melancholy. It started Sunday morning at around 3 am after a nice Saturday. Pumpkin threw up a couple of times and I got panicky and the downward spiral began of full-on panic attack then crying for a full day straight between sleeping. BTW Pumpkin is fine, I think some pepperonis messed her tummy up. My tummy has been messed up too. I passed Sunday morning, I think around 10 am. Panic attacks suck all your energy.
Around 2 that afternoon my dad dropped off the contents of my mom’s purse and her diary from when she was in high school. He rang the doorbell but I figured it was just landscapers or a church dropping flyers off. He texted after he left and said he left something for me outside. It was her old hairbrush, sunglasses, license and a couple pens but also in the bag was the diary. So I spent the next 4 hours crying and reading it.
The diary is such a treasure though, it chronicles the years !967-69. She talks all about meeting my dad and them dating up until they got married. It’s the sweetest and cutest thing ever to read. We also have the exact same writing style. She had a happening social life too. I love how twice she calls my dad “stupid ass”.
Reading through it has had an odd effect on me. I am sad but entertained and happy. I feel close to her. I haven’t felt that closeness in years. She’s been gone 11 years I believe now. She’s all I can think about right now. I see her in everything I do and say. I mean, I always have, just more aware of it lately and it fucking hurts. I just feel weird, trapped in my own head and distracted. I feel like I am grieving all over again. I literally feel like she just died all over again. I tried to say busy yesterday, I played in makeup, wrote a review, washed dishes, went shopping, did laundry but I felt so disconnected to everything. Like I was on autopilot.
I am feeling much more normal today thankfully. I hate feeling like that. Ross was incredibly sweet though and comforting. Stayed up with me the whole time and made sure I and Pumpkin were both okay. Poor puppy, as yucky as her tummy was, she was more concerned about me being upset.
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